Vulcan Stev's Database

It's a BLOG Captain, but not as we know it.

Movie Mash-ups

A friend of mine and I were playing a game of Movie Title Mash-up on Facebook.  This game takes two movie titles and smooshes them together at the common words.  We spent about three hours back and forth coming up with these:

If you think of some others please leave them in the comments.

2012 Angry Men
Snakes on a Plain, Train and Automobile
White Christmas with the Kranks
My Fair Ladyhawke
Vanilla Sky High
White Nights of the Living Dead
9 1/2 Wolverines: Origins
The Hunt for Red October Sky
Star Wars of the Roses
A Shark Tale of Two Cities
Princess Mononoke and the Pea
Snow White Fang
Men in Black Who Stare at Goats
A Justice League of their Own
The Ghost Rider and Mrs. Muir
The Lord of the Ringu
Fantastic Four Weddings and a Funeral
Forever Young Frankenstein
About a Hellboy
Lara Croft: Tomb Raider of the Lost Ark
License to Kill a Mockingbird
Harry Potter and the Chamber of the Secret Garden
Escape from the Gangs of New York
Quantum Leap of Solace
Mission Impossible to Mars
Trek Gate Wars
The Lion King and I
Oh Godfather
XXX-Men
Through Stargates of Splendor
The Day After Tomorrow Never Dies
The DaVinci Code of Honor
Charlie’s Angels & Demons
Bambo
Dare Devil Wears Prada
Along Came a Spider-Man
League of Extraordinary Gentlemen Prefer Blondes
Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure in Babysitting
Red Dawn of the Dead
Meet G.I. Joe Black
Monsters vs. Aliens vs. Predator
Ocean’s 2012
2010 Commandments
Sleeping Beauty and the Beast
Alice in Wonderland of the Lost
Around the War of the World in 80 Days
Cinderellaphant Man
Wall-E. T.
Pirates of the Caribbean Who Don’t Do Anything
2001: A Space Jam Odyssey
Men in Black Beauty
The Blues Brother Bear

November 11, 2009 Posted by | Movie Trivia, Movies | , | 8 Comments

The View from My Chair: Sequels that shouldn’t have been made

star_trek_v_ver2One of the things I’ve been doing more of since the modem went down is watching DVDs with PITs 2&3.  We’ve got a pretty extensive collection.  PIT #3 noticed the large number of sequels we have in our collection.  He wondered why Hollywood made so many sequels.  I tired my best to explain that movies are very expensive to make and that Hollywood (as a general rule is more apt to make a second movie when the first has proven successful.  PIT #3 then wanted to know “Why Hollywood made crappy sequels?”

His simple question left me thinking the same thing.  This train of thought then morphed into what Hollywood sequels probably seemed like a slam dunk to whoever green light it but probably shouldn’t have ever been filmed.

#1: Star Trek V: The Final Frontier – The movie that proves William Shatner can’t direct.  The insipid story line and faithless use of the characters doomed this flick from the outset.  What went wrong with this turkey could be a whole column all to itself

#2: Superman IV: The Quest for Peace – Singlehandedly responsible for sinking the Superman franchise.  This movie showcases one of the problems with bringing a 4-color property to the big screen.  Whereas the comic book writer has multiple issues to introduce a formidable opponent for the hero, the motion picture has approximately two hours to introduce, set up the battle with, and have the hero defeat, the villain.

#3 & 4 Karate Kid 3, The Next Karate Kid: Continuing the story after a CLEAR ending is one of Hollywood’s bigger mis-steps.  It is also a sure sign that the movie was green-lit by a “suit” interested in money and not because they have a good story to tell.  Then the further miscue of Hollywood thinking that the previous failure had something to do with the cast, meaning a re-cast and another bad movie.

#5 Batman & Robin: Psychedelic colors, a complete disregard for the Bat Universe (even the one established for the film) and forced conflict between Batman and Robin doomed an otherwise credible performance by Clooney.  On the other hand this flop paved the way for Batman Begins

#6 Herbie Goes Bananas: This movie seemed to me that somebody at Disney was desperately looking for hit and authorized a less than stellar script “just to get something out there”.  Having a prop being the only connection to the previous movies (albeit a prop that folks had emotional involvement in) that close to the release dates of the other movies wasn’t the best idea either.

#7 The Lion King 1 1/2: Seriously? turning one of Disney’s animated classics into a clipfest and tons of rude jokes was completely unnecessary.  Disney’s animation department was coasting at this point.

#8 & #9 Ghostbusters 2 & Gremlins 2: Clear examples of taking a hit movie, hiring original cast, having a cool idea, and still not capturing the magic.  Hey Hollywood, we’ll wait until you have a script that is actually watchable.

#10  #11 Smokey and the Bandit Part 3 & Speed 2: When the movie’s success is in large part due to the chemistry of it’s stars, do NOT attempt to make a sequel without those same actors.

There’s definitely more sequels out there that shouldn’t have been made.

I’d be interested to hear yours

September 10, 2009 Posted by | Movie Reviews, Movies | , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 3 Comments

I’m ba-ack

It’s been awhile but I think I’ve got the modem problems fixed to the point of being able to blog again.  So where to begin?  There’ll be some changes coming to the blog.  I’ll still be writing about gaming but I’ll branching out to cover some of my other interests.  I also won’t be putting up daily content.  One of the things that came out of my enforced hiatus was PIT #3 expressing his happiness that Daddy wasn’t spending EVERY NIGHT at the laptop writing about gaming instead of actually playing.

Updates on the V.S. family:

Mrs. V.S. has finished her chemo treatments.  She is back at work interpreting for a 4th grade deaf student.  She goes to see the Radiology Oncologist on Wednesday and we learn at that point whether she’ll be undergoing radiation therapy.  Her hair is growing back, unfortunately it isn’t returning in the appropriate color.

PIT #1 is now Pvt. Spartan.  She is done with basic and is now undergoing A.I.T.  She’ll be back to providing her unique insights into the movie reviews (in fact she’s already phoned in her first).  She’s not completely online yet as her new laptop does not have net access inside her barracks.

PIT #2 is back in school.  He’s in Ac Dec this year and is looking forward to being the oldest at home.  He’s also back in Tae Kwon Do and will be testing for his camo belt next weekend.

PIT #3 has discovered Wizard’s 101.  He’s not as enthralled with 4e he terms it “offline gaming”.  When I asked him to clarify he responded that 4e wasn’t role playing.  It was more like the games he plays online only without the computer.

Me… I have sold the redemption center.  I’m back to punching a clock instead of working for myself.  This is not a step backwards as I’m using my degree.  I’m working as an ad designer for a local paper and loving it.  I’m also working on a “sekrit pojikt” that I’ll be sharing as soon as it’s ready to go.

What changes are coming to blog?  There will be still be gaming stuff.  However, my first love/obsession is movies.  I’ll be blogging more about films.  The family will still be doing reviews, however we’ll be adding blog posts about the goofs we picked up on while watching the films we’ve reviewed.  I’ll be adding some columns about comic books as well as bringing back Goober’s Words of Wisdom.

So bang the drum, sound the gong, let it be known far and wide.  Stev is back.

September 6, 2009 Posted by | Comic Books, Life near an Iowa Cornfield, Movies, Mrs. Vulcan Stev's Fight, RPG | , , , , , , , , , | 5 Comments

Vulcan Stev Family Movie Review: Tales of the Black Freighter

Two videos on one DVD. So you get a two-for-one review:
tales_of_the_black_freighter_dvdTales of the Balck Freighter
Starring:
Gerard Butler …  The Sea Captain (voice)
Cam Clarke …  Money Lender (voice)
Siobhan Flynn …  Sea Captain’s Daughter (voice)
Jared Harris …  Ridley (voice)
Salli Saffioti …  Sea Captain’s Daughter (voice)
Lori Tritel …  Sea Captain’s Wife (voice)

Under the Hood
Starring:
Jay Brazeau …  Bernard / News Vendor
Frank Cassini …  Lawrence Shexnayder
Glenn Ennis …  Hooded Justice
Matt Frewer …  Edgar Jacobi / Moloch the Mystic
Ted Friend …  Larry Culpeper
Carla Gugino …  Sally Jupiter / Silk Spectre
Erik Johnson …  Commercial Narrator (voice)
Rob LaBelle …  Wally Weaver
Niall Matter …  Mothman
Stephen McHattie …  Hollis Mason / Nite Owl
Jeffrey Dean Morgan …  Edward Blake / The Comedian
Dan Payne …  Dollar Bill
Darryl Scheelar …  Captain Metropolis
William Taylor …  William Long
Apollonia Vanova …  Silhouette

Reviewers: VS, PIT #2, PIT #3

VS:
TotBF – .75 pointed ears
A very nicely animated, true to the source material, cartoon sequence.  Therein lies part of my problem with this sequence.  I didn’t care for the comic-within-the-comic.  The cartoon is rated R and rightly so.  It is graphic in it’s outlook and tone and not suitable for kids.  The subject matter, while an interesting counterpoint to the comic it appears in, seems out of place when excerpted into its own format.  It is a very dark and depressing storyline and is NOT suitable for children.  Watching this portion made me regret

UtH – 1.8 pointed ears.
The saving grace for this DVD.  The Culpepper Minute provides a lot of backstory to the movie.  Most of the complaints I saw on the boards from the general public about the Watchmen movie would’ve been answered by watching this video first.  The producers did a very nice job of translating straight text into a engaging video production.

PIT #2
TotBF – .5 pointed ears
Nice animation, that’s the only good thing about this cartoon.  The entire story was overly gory and pointless

UtH – 1.5 pointed ears
The background information contained in this video was a nice addition to the movie.  I can’t wait to watch Watchmen on DVD again.

PIT #3
TotBF – .5 pointed ears
When I dislike a Pirate movie  you know it’s bad.  I don’t recommend this cartoon at all.  The fact that it’s about pirates is the only redeeming feature.  The song playing over the credits was annoying as well.

UtH – 1 pointed ear
This movie gave us a lot of background info about the Watchmen.  I wish I had seen this before Daddy took us to see the Watchmen.

Overall: TotBF – 1.75 out of 6 pointed ears :: UtH 4.3 pointed ears out of 6
This DVD comes recommended for Watchman fans or for those planning on buying or renting the Watchmen DVD, with reservations.  The Under the Hood segments provides a backstory only hinted at in the opening credits of the motion picture.  The Tales of the Black Freighter segment is there for the purists, if you enjoyed that portion of the graphic novel you will enjoy the cartoon.

Bonus material: the first issue of the Watchmen comic is presented in an animated.  This DVD is 2/3 recommended.

June 27, 2009 Posted by | Movie Reviews, Movies | , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments