Order of the D30: Curses to Place on Your Magical Items
Another article in my Order of the D30 series.
Magical items are not everyone’s cup of tea. Some gamers have gone so far as to tell me they’ll never play a game where magic is used. Less alarmist gamers view magic and magical items as a crutch that a PC will use instead of actual battle.
One way to balance the use of magic in your game is to place curses on the magical items. “That’s great,” you say, “but where do I find some really cool curses?”
Have no fear, just roll on this handy table and viola` instant curse.
1. The Fleas of a Thousand Camels – Any attempt to use this item summons the fleas from a thousand camels. The fleas find that the PC is an acceptable new home.
2. Cortez’s Curse of Immortality – Keeping and using this treasure will grant you the same immortality from Pirates of the Caribbean.
3. Alethia’s Curse of Veritas – The Greek goddess compels the user of this item to NEVER lie. You can’t lie. There is no saving throw. Your alignment determines how much stress you are under when telling the compelled truth.
4. Eternal Night – Users of this item are cursed to live in darkness. They need torches to see in broad daylight.
5. The Curse of Eternal Shedding– You lose all your hair and it never grows back as long as the item is in your posession.
6. Haud Sapor Victus– If you have this cursed item in your inventory and eat anything without thanking your deity for the food, the food tastes like cardboard.
7. The Curse of the Monkey Poo– Using this item summons a baboon that adopts your party. If any PC does something stupid (GM discretion) the baboon flings poo at that PC.
8. The Curse of the Velico Requiro – This item curses one of the PC’s weapons at random. If any roll misses it’s target to hit by 10 or more, the miss is critical.
9. Darlington Stripe – Any vehicle the PC is operating now has a tendency to veer towards an obstacle and brush up against it.
10. Taste the Rainbow – After any rain storm the owner of this item is pelted with small colorful orbs.
11. The Curse of Lucky the Leprechaun – Everyone else is determined to wrest ownership of this item from you.
12. Atractivo Para los Gatos– Cats suddenly find you irresistible. They NEVER leave you alone.
13. Perro Orinar – Canines suddenly seem to think that your PC is a tree (if you catch my drift).
14. Levis Negotium – You are all knowing. But only really useless knowledge.
15. Carcer Extraho Carmen – You are unable to talk. You must sing everything.
16. The Curse of I.B. Flemming– Every adventure one of your pieces of gear breaks.
17. Perpes Erroris – If you fail a task with this item in your possession you will continue to fail that task on every subsequent attempt.
18. Rapio Vestri Informatio – Any idea the PC has is considered a bad idea by the party, however really good ideas are immediately suggested by another party member.
19. Molestus Sonitus – Off key music follows the party wherever the party goes.
20. Parvulus Sermo – The PC is reduced to “baby talk” for 1d6 days.
21. Amicabiliter Inconcinnus – The PC is unable to articulate themselves to the next 1d6 members of the opposite gender.
22. Parvulus Singulus Cornu – The party is adopted by a bad luck baby unicorn.
23. Iners Secuutus – The PC acquires a lower level follower. However this follower suffers from inability to do ANYTHING with any degree of success.
24. Amplus Creatura– PC is turned into a Bullywug for 1d6 days
25. Deus Non Hic– Any prayers to your deity are answered with an automated, “We’re sorry your Deity cannot answer right now.”
26. Incompertus Populus – For 1d10 days your race is completely forgotten.
27. Viagra Enzyte – Every treasure map acquired by the PC leads to bogus male enhancement potions.
28. Samson’s Saeta Fatum – If the PC ever gets a haircut his strength stat is at 10% of normal until his hair grows back to normal length.
29. Incendia Incommoditas – Fire attacks now do double damage to the PC.
30. Glacies Incommoditas – Ice attacks now do double damage to the PC
There you go 30 curses ready to use.