Vulcan Stev's Database

It's a BLOG Captain, but not as we know it.

I Hate 5e D&D errata

I had a brilliant idea.  I’d take all of the recent tweets about the specualtive hating of the fifth edition of D&D.  Surprise! as I was scrolling through the tweets, I found out that my friend over at All Geek Out had already done so in this post.  However more have been posted since his blog article, so I offer this errata for why I hate D&D 5e.

JuliusTheOrange: The only prestige class is ninja wizard. They get bear familiars w/ laser eyes.  

majyc: Given you can only play online it seems a bit much to REQUIRE you buy physical minis to make them available on the virtual tabletop. 

DivineRankZero: Really? There’s only three skills? Use mouth, use head, and use feet.

vulcanstev: My Little Pony, Dire Ponies, Bullywug Ponies, and My Little Centaur occupy 10 pages of the Monster Manual.

AsaTJ: So class selection is now pared down to “bourgeoisie” and “proletariat?” I don’t get it.

ExplodingDragon: In 5e DMs will mainly be programmers of AIs that display maps, control enemy tactics and read text in Ian McKellen’s voice.

ExplodingDragon: In 5e there will be a table to roll a die to see who brings the food to next weeks session.  

ExplodingDragon: For 5e WotC will merge with Games Workshop, make minitures mandatory and Hit Points dependant on how well painted the mini is.

geeksdreamgirl: In 5e, there’s only two alignments: Naughty and Nice. Santa decides which one you will be.

dalcher: 5e will feature a Quickling familiar named Asmodiar that only you can see, his provided benefits can’t be perceived by anyone else.  

WyattSalazar: The official D&D “amerimanga” by Tokyopop does not have cute enough girls to interest me. Except for that Drow loli.

newbiedm: Susan Boyle is the iconic bard from a small village? Cmon Mearls!

vulcanstev In 5e WotC owns the rights to your characters. There is a per play fee on all creations using the ruleset.

panthera_onca: Why did they replace dragons with chromatic and metallic flumphs?!?

e2thej: What? The Forgotten Realms have slid *backwards* 5,000 years before Mystra’s birth. No magic and everyone’s a barbarian.

DaanRedblade: To ensure people roleplay correctly, instead of rulebooks 5e provides read aloud D&D scripts, written by Courtney Solomon.

June 6, 2009 Posted by | Legacy D&D, Life near an Iowa Cornfield, News, Reviews and Culture, RPG | , , , | 5 Comments

Vulcan Stev Family Movie Review: Star Wars I: The Phantom Menace

Liam Neeson …  Qui-Gon Jinn
Ewan McGregor …  Obi-Wan Kenobi
Natalie Portman …  Queen Padmé Amidala
Jake Lloyd …  Anakin Skywalker
Pernilla August …  Shmi Skywalker
Frank Oz …  Yoda (voice)
Ian McDiarmid …  Senator Palpatine
Oliver Ford Davies …  Gov. Sio Bibble
Ray Park …  Darth Maul
Hugh Quarshie …  Capt. Panaka
Ahmed Best …  Jar Jar Binks (voice)
Anthony Daniels …  C-3PO
Kenny Baker …  R2-D2
Terence Stamp …  Supreme Chancellor Valorum
Brian Blessed …  Boss Nass

Synopsis from IMDb:
The evil Trade Federation, led by Nute Gunray (Carson) is planning to take over the peaceful world of Naboo. Jedi’s Qui-Gon Jinn (Neeson) and Obi-Wan Kenobi (McGregor) are sent to confront the leaders. But not everything goes to plan. The two Jedis escape, and along with their new Gungan friend, Jar Jar Binks (Best) head to Naboo to warn Queen Amidala (Portman), but droids have already started to capture Naboo and the Queen is not safe there. Eventually they land on Tatooine, where they become friends with a young boy known as Anakin Skywalker (Lloyd). Qui-Gon is curious about the boy, and sees a bright future for him. The group must now find a way of getting to Coruscant and to finally solve this trade dispute, but there is someone else hiding in the shadows. Are the sith really extinct? Is the Queen who she really says she is? and what’s so special about this young boy? All these questions and more in the first chapter of the epic Star Wars.

Reviewers VS, PIT #1, PIT #2, PIT #3

VS: 1.75 pointed ears
I don’t understand the hate bestowed on this movie by supposed fans.  Yes, Jar-Jar was annoying.  Yes, the acting was wooden and yes, George Lucas proves once again that his skills lie in story telling and not in directing.  Watching this movie again I was struck by the fact that the CGI characters are more “animated” than the actors.  Check out Sebulba’s introductory scene and the cut-scenes of Qui Gon’s party  during the pod race.  Sebulba is all over the place and his humanoid dining companions just sit there.  Jar Jar is moving all over the booth while the humans sit there motionless.

The more obvious points of Lucas the story-teller are when we’re told that Obi Wan is headstrong instead of shown.  Being told about the suffering on Nayboo instead of being shown the suffering.  The movie has lots of “Wow!” moments.  However “wow” moments do not make a movie continuable watchable.  That said, this is still a fun family friendly flick and is not deserving of the “hate”.

PIT #1 – 1.75 pointed ears
Die Jar Jar die (this review was tweeted in and that is the sum total of the review)

PIT #2 – 2 pointed ears
This was a very nice start to the saga.  I like looking for the subtle hints and foreshadowing that Lucas interspersed throughout.  I’ve been playing Lego Star Wars with PIT #3.  Some of the scenes make a heck of lot more sense now that I’ve refreshed my memory on the movie.  Pod racing is harder than it looks.

PIT #3 – 1.9 pointed ears
This is my introduction to the Star Wars.  I don’t remember watching the other Star Wars movies until after I’d seen this one.  Qui Gonn Jinn is my all time favorite Jedi.  It was a shame that he had to die.

Overall 7.4 out of 8
As far as prequels go I’ve seen better and I’ve seen worse.  This movie could’ve been a heckuva lot better with some editing or if it had been cut to about 45 minutes and combined with II.  Thank you Lord that Abrams didn’t follow Lucas’ formula with the Trek reboot.

If you’re the type that buys DVDs you probably already own this one.  If this is your first exposure to Star Wars, don’t judge the rest of the saga by this opening round.

June 6, 2009 Posted by | Movie Reviews | , , , , , , , | 7 Comments

Dungeons & Dragons Edition Wars: Why?

I’ve been sitting here reading through various blogs, forums, tweets about why people hate D&D version (X).  Twitter yesterday even had folks espousing their hatred of 5th edition and it hasn’t even come out yet.  I’ve read why folks hate and love every edition of D&D.

I understand that 4e “emphasizes battle over role play” and that seems to be why folks both love and hate it.  My Sunday afternoon gaming group is currently running AD&D and we happen to love playing with those rules.

I will admit to being the type of person of dislikes change for change’s sake.  I don’t upgrade my software if the current version works fine.  I’ve had the same cell-phone for 3 years.  I’ll drive my car until it doesn’t run anymore.  However I doubt that’s the reason for all the love/hate written up on the net.

I played D&D and AD&D in high school and gave it up due to the “Devil’s Game” scare of the mid 80’s.  It was a move designed to make Mom and Dad happy.  It wasn’t much of a sacrifice as I preferred Car Wars and James Bond.  I lost interest in RPGs during my college years.  I missed 3e completely.

My resurgence in interest of RPG came about because my kids were finally old enough to find the hobby on their own.  We’ve played 4e and aside from the interminable time in takes to resolve combat, we didn’t have any problems with it.  I even bought the core books at World D&D day.

My question to you is what is your favorite edition of D&D and why?  If you dislike a version, why?

June 6, 2009 Posted by | Legacy D&D, News, Reviews and Culture, RPG | , , , | 24 Comments