Demotivational Poster:The Oscars(R)

So the 83rd award nominees were announced. Big Deal! Now Scram!
(editor’s note: the views expressed by Mr. Grouch do not necessarily represent those of this blog, it’s parent or subsidiary companies.)

Demotivational Poster:Walken

Later on we’ll conspire…

The Hand of F.A.T.E. – Meet the characters

F.A.T.E. is the Fortean Artifact Tracking Extension.  The Hand of F.A.T.E. is a team comprised of five individuals.  They are:

Index is the leader, born and raised in Iowa; Chris DeHart is a former Army Ranger.  His discipline is Tae Kwon Do.  Dark-haired and fit, Chris’ record has more “classified” holes than not.  If there were a real world equivalent of Captain America, it would be Chris DeHart

Middle is the weapons expert.  Adam St. George is English aristocracy.  Born with a silver spoon in his mouth, Adam never wanted for anything as a child.  Slight of stature and small in frame, Adam was constantly picked on in school.  Adam’s parents hired the best martial arts coaches money could buy.  Adam excelled in unarmed combat.  However when it was time to begin training in weapons disciplines, Adam found his calling.  He can field strip (weapon) in a completely dark room.  His personal philosophy is why put yourself in danger by being close to the enemy if you can deal with the situation from a distance.  Adam considers it a failure if the opposition gets close enough to his team that unarmed combat becomes necessary.

Ringer, an Israeli, is the infiltration expert.  Batia Sharett is the only member of the team who was previously employed by an intelligence organization.  Spotted early on she was recruited by Mossad directly out of college.  Trained in every aspect of the intelligence community, Batia excelled in covert infiltrations.  Her curvaceous features belie her ability to become just about anyone.  She can be a runway model one day and homeless person the next.  Neither she nor Chris acknowledges the mutual attraction each feels for the other.  They are professionals first, maybe someday, but for now their sole focus is the job at hand.

Pinky is transportation/logistics, Angel Blackburn.  Small, petite, Angel is more at home underneath a piece of classic Detroit iron than she is in a boutique.  She can drive, pilot, or helm nearly any form of Terran transportation.  She keeps her blonde hair short because it’s easier to keep clean. She’s also the person who can find the necessary items to implement the team’s plans.  If the team is in the middle of an arctic snowstorm and needs dry firewood, Angel can find it.

Thumb is tech support and the backbone of the team.  The son of Chinese immigrants to America, Shunyuan Liao (his family is from the Jiangxi province of China and he has westernized his name) is better known by his online identity Ectoplasm67.  S.L., as he is called by his “meatspace” friends, is an ubergeek.  Not content with state of the art tech, he builds and/or jury rigs his own.  His home-built system is something Steve Jobs and Bill Gates would kill for.  Give him a cell phone and access to the net, S.L. can hack into just about anything.  S.L. takes the meaning of his given name seriously, (Shunyuan is Chinese for “follow to the source”) he combs the net looking for trouble spots.  A black-belt in Kung Fu, S.L. can handle himself in the field.  Despite the fact that S.L. looks and sounds like the clichéd geek, he is fit.  If there’s a movie/comic/tv/pop culture reference to be made, S.L. will make it.

Berin Livingston Harwell is the palm that directs the Hand.  Mysterious and aloof, this grizzled, world-weary, facilitator is the man who brings the team together.

Demotivational Poster: Tribbles

Sometimes it’s better to not ask “What’s for supper?”

Updates…

Things aren’t too bad here in the Ozarks.  It’s drizzling outside right now as I’m doing volunteer guard duty at church.  My church is hosting their second Wild Game night this weekend.  There are lots of donated hunting mounts.  Insurance requires there be at least people inside the building 24/7.  I volunteered for the 10-2 shift every day this week.

I’m still looking for work, I’m being a little choosy as I want to continue working in industry in some sort of capacity.  What I mean is that I’m applying for work with jobs that involve graphic design in some sort or another.  I’m not applying for a job flipping burgers.  God is providing me the opportunity to do so.  Ashya and I are in agreement that we are not hurting financially and we can afford for me to look for a job I’ll be happy with as opposed to “Ah we need Stev working NOW.”

In the meantime, I’m keeping myself busy:
Project 40 Eridani A is my attempt to get some freelance work.  I’ve already got 3 pro bono projects in the works, just to get my name out in the community.

Project Connor is an all new, non-Stev story that I’m working on.  The Hand of F.A.T.E.  I’ve got character sketches put together for the five main protagonists.  I’m excited about this one.

United or Untied is my serialized Stev story.  I haven’t abandoned it, it was just one of the things stored on the mysteriously erased thumb drive.

Demotivational Posters and other cool Photoshoppy stuff are now being done under Project 40 Eridani A…..

Ashya and I will be celebrating our 3-month anniversary next week.  It’s hard to believe (in a good way) that it’s only been three months.  No news is good news, all four of the boys seem to be doing well in school.  Private Black Spartan has confirmed that no aliens have invaded in the past week.

I hope to have the next installment of United or Untied up this week or next.  I’ve also got more demotivational posters in the works, I’m just stuck on some of the “jokes”.

Demotivational Poster: Movie Night on the Enterprise

Talking during movies is illogical.

Demotivational Poster: Master Control Program

Bill Gates and the MCP control the world as they know but each is unsatisfied and craves more.

Random Fake Band:Kraja

This was a game on Facebook a few weeks back.  I’m continuing it here at the blog in an exercise in creativity.  This week’s Fake Band: Kraja

What songs do you think are on this album?

Wanna play along? 1. Go to Wikipedia and click Random article. The article you get is the name of your band.

2. Go to QuotationsPage.com and hit Random Quotes. The last four or five words of the very last quote of the page is the title of your first album.

3. Go to Flickr.com and click on explore the last seven days. The third picture, no matter what it is, will be your album cover. Note: I’m only using Creative Commons licensed pics here, with attributions.

4. Use photoshop or picnik.com (a free online photo editor) to put it all together.

If you do play along, please link back here and I’ll collect the links in a later posting.

Who’s in your jeesh?

I just finished reading Ender in Exile.  This is the most recent book in Orson Scott Card’s Ender Universe.  I saw the book in the bargain bin at Wal Mart.  Even though we are counting our pennies, my wife saw the look of glee on my face and acquiesced to its purchase.

Card’s stories about genius children saving the human race from the onslaught of an invading alien menace has got to be one of my favorite fictional universes.  The book was excellent and for the first time in a while I was immersed in world that I could not put down.

This is not a review of the novel.

What happened was this, Ender makes constant reference to his jeesh, a small private army of your friends who you know has always got your back.  I got to thinking that Ender was a pretty lucky guy to have a group like that.  Then I got to thinking who would be in my jeesh were I fortunate enough to have one…

In no particular oder:
Berin Kinsman; a superhero currently living in the desert southwest.  We have never met face-to-face, but he is a brother in every sense of the word.  During my darkest moments surrounding the death of Mrs. VS, Berin was there as an ear to listen, a reassuring voice, and source of inspiration.

William Lawton; my brother, my friend, my GM.  My daughter introduced us when she told me that I should come play in her gaming group.  Bill is one person who can honestly say he lives in my head (scary thought).  He gets me.

Brook Ullum; the children’s pastor at church.  She allowed me to once again use my puppeteering skills with children.  She shares my sense of humor (another scary thought).

Hank Harwell; an expatriated Texan.  He is an officer and a gentleman.  He shares my faith and has been a rock when I needed it.  Another of my brothers-from-another-mother.  We’ve never met face-to-face but I do know that someday we will.

Adrienne Paradis; my writing partner of over 20 years.  She’s one of the few people who knows Stev as well as I do.

S.L. Shirley; a fellow Dire Paladin.  Stefan would follow me into an autoduel with no questions asked.

48 Fan & Private Blackspartan; yes they’re my kids.  How many dads can say that they are friends with their children?

Lady Ashya T’Sai; my friend, my partner, my wife.  We were friends in high school.  I missed asking her out by three weeks.  She shares my sense of humor, my likes, my worldview, and many other things.  God brought her back in to my life after 25 years.  I don’t know what I’d do without her.